Tag: SELF-HELP

Mistakes Are Part Of The Human Experience… They Are A Valuable Learning Tool

Many people have written about the human condition because it fascinates people. It is fascinating and it changes as time goes on. Carl Rogers, as part of his people-centered therapeutic approach truly believed that all humans have the inherent need, ability and desire to improve themselves and become better people. Stephen Covey, in his groundbreaking…

Mindful Acceptance Leads To Self-Compassion

“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.” ― M. Scott Peck As a…

Counter-dependency: Fleeing Intimacy And Connection

Many of my recent posts have delved into some of the root causes of codependency and how developmental trauma plays a major role. This puts parenting (or the lack of it) at the centre of discussion. As I discussed recently in a post The Roots Of Codependency, we all go through a codependent phase, just…

The Lack Of Psychological Birth That Leads To Codependency

Codependency is not a disease and should not be treated like one. When managed care systems finally recognise it as a disorder, there will surely be a push to apply a medical model to recovery, where such systems are only willing to pay for a few sessions supplemented by medication. It is my firm opinion…

Codependents: Letting Go And Relapsing

Codependents love to give. It is what they do, continually. As I have mentioned in previous posts, this giving comes with an element of return… giving for codependents means having control and they try to keep that status quo. However, despite these attempts, it sometimes goes wrong and a decision needs to be made… a…

Spanking Doesn’t Work And Drives Bad Behaviour Underground

Over the weekend, I witnessed a physical assault on a young child. You might not be surprised to know that he was with his parents at the time. I was in a store with my wife and a couple who had previously allowed their young boy to run around unattended, suddenly sprung into action when…

Why We Hate Ourselves… And Never Know Why

There is much hate in our world. It is seen everywhere, on the street, in the media and in our towns and cities. However, in my experience, some of the most intense hate I often see is the hate that people often turn inward towards themselves. It is the most intense hate one could imagine…

Controlling Codependency: Keeping Others In Line

Narcissists always get a bad press and probably rightly so. (At this point, we should note that we should only use the term narcissist when someone has been officially diagnosed with NPD. Also, there are degrees of narcissism). The common belief is that they are void of compassion and empathy and are not capable of…

After A Narcissist..What Next?

So, you have done the hard part. The narcissist is thankfully gone. It matters little whether discard happened or the courage was finally found to get rid of them, the important thing is that they are gone. So what next? How do you move on from being emotionally, physical and probably financially drained and abused?…