Tag: ONLINE THERAPY

Change for the better: The role of a Father

As I work longer with clients, it is clear that the parenting style that they were subjected to as a child is extremely important in determining how they see the world. This conditioning is often taken into adulthood and causes dysfunction in relationships and in life generally. The role both parents play is important but new research…

Making the change : You as the star of your own story!

In my earlier posts, I have looked in great detail at our thinking traps, how they affect our lives and where they may have come from. I hope it has helped some of you to recognise yourself in them. It is easy to write about what goes wrong, more difficult to put plans into operation to…

Changing for the better : The impact of our beginnings.

Think about the following situations and the resulting behavior : A text message from your partner’s former lover sends you into a spiral of rage, insecurity and self-doubt. They reassure you but you are convinced they are cheating. You want to change your job but fail to apply for a new one because you are convinced…

Depression: Recognising our thinking traps :Part 2

One of my favorite Buddha quotes is : “We are what we think”. Never was a truer word spoken.  These thinking traps are part of old patterns that lie behind our thinking, feeling and behavior and often lead to things going wrong. Hard as we then try to make things better, they often get worse and then…

Depression : Changing for the Better.

This is the first in a series of posts about change. Everbody talks about big changes, quantum leaps into a new way of living and seeing the world, shedding the shackles of the past and making the future brighter. Good as this is (and important), it is often the small daily changes we can make…

Re-parenting your Inner Child

We have seen clearly in my previous set of posts how an inner critic is formed from the defense mechanisms used by the wounded, criticised child and how these can be taken forward into adulthood. Part of the process of dealing with the inner critic and the chaos it causes is to re-parent our inner child, showing…

The Inner Critic comes in all forms

“I am really driven, but my drive doesn’t affect the conversations I have in my head about life, and my worries and fears and insecurities.” Zach Braff . Following on from my last post about the early influences we experience that can form the inner critic . The concept of an inner critic is well known but most…

Depression Research Update

Feeling down from time to time is a normal part of life. But when emptiness and despair take hold and won’t go away, it may be depression. More than just the temporary “blues,” the lows of depression make it tough to function and enjoy life as you once did. Hobbies and friends don’t interest you like they used…

Accepting Failure and Learning from it

Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat.  It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only  by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing. Failure is something we all must come to terms with. Businesses and relationships fail to make it, targets are…

Depression did not define me and the same is true for you.

I once read a very interesting description of depression. It went something like: “I am depression. I am cold like the Arctic mist, I dampen your spirits and your soul. I fill your mind with gloom. When I appear, you are but a withered leaf under wet snow. But I can do much more. I can…