Tag: Narcissistic abuse

Silent Treatment: A Nemesis For Codependency And Generally Indefensible

Yesterday, I read an article by a “life coach” who said that silent treatment was justified mostly because your partner “probably deserved it”. I read on hoping that the article would clarify this by looking at “time-outs” and drawing a clear distinction or that she might be referring to “no-contact”, a clear strategy when dealing…

Codependency: Why Red Flags Give Us All The Information We Need

“The red flags are usually there, you just have to keep your eyes open wider than your heart.” ― April Mae Monterrosa In my daily work with codependents, I hear a lot about so-called “red-flags”. Usually this comes when clients are describing the early stages of a relationship they were or are in. If they are describing…

Podcast: Moving On After A Break-Up

Have you just broken up? Feeling bad… Not knowing where to go or what to do? Listen to the new podcast around Dr. Nicholas Jenner’s book “Our Quest For Happily Ever After & Why It sometimes does Not Work’. We discuss a section taken from the third chapter of the book called: “Taking The First Steps…

Life After Narcissism: Further Toxic Or Nourishing? It Is Your Choice!

What next when your worst nightmare is over? Many codependents who manage to extract themselves from toxic or narcissistic relationships are often left with this question. Initially, the big danger is that they end up in another toxic relationship similar to the last. This is the only type of relationship they know and they gravitate…

Don’t Allow A Narcissist To Use Your Child To Destroy You

It takes a lot to remove a narcissist from your life. Not only the fact that he is not all that willing for you to make that call but also the actions and thoughts of the people involved with them often make it difficult. Especially codependents hang around until the bitter end (or longer) hoping…

Narcissism: Why Would You Let Anyone Treat You Like That?

As a therapist and a person who deals in reality and common sense in my own life, it is hard to see some of the decisions that other people make in the name of love and devotion. What happens to the human brain that cannot see the plainly obvious in front of them? Where intelligent,…

The Major Factors In Recovery From Codependency

IAt the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships. This means accepting responsibility for change and not passing that responsibility (or blame) onto others. It takes courage to look at and assess early life experiences and learn new skills that will help deal with early…

Connecting With And Reparenting Your Inner Child-like Self

Try this: Before leaving home one morning, you took an extra effort in getting your living room cleaned, but when you return in the evening, you find it in a mess. What will your response be? Sigh and clean up again  Shrug your shoulder and leave it as it is  or get upset and cry Shut…

Should You Bother Trying To Set Boundaries With A Narcissist?

I talk a lot about boundaries. I believe they are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries means being emotionally honest, assertive and it means protect your emotional and physical space. Boundaries maintained and with appropriate consequences teach people in a healthy way how you want to be treated. In therapy, especially with codependents,…

Once Gone, Never Let Your Narcissist Ex-Partner Return (But Your Child Is A Complication)

It takes a lot to remove a narcissist from your life. Not only the fact that he is not all that willing for you to make that call but also the actions and thoughts of the people involved with them often make it difficult. Especially codependents hang around until the bitter end (or longer) hoping…