Tag: experience

Nostalgia And Connecting With My Inner Self

I have recently been very nostalgic about the Seventies. Not with any great fondness but it was a very significant time for me. In this decade, I went from being 8 to 18 and my near adult self was formed. Growing up in the UK at this time was not easy. The political  situation was…

Codependency: How To Give Up Control And Stop Rescuing Everyone

Codependency is a lot about control and controlling others. I have documented various methods frequently on this blog and how they manifest themselves into the typical dysfunctional behaviour associated with codependency. Codependents need control to feel secure and are loath to give this power away. One of the more common forms of control employed by…

Codependents: It’s Ok Not To Forgive Your Toxic Parents

The headline is perhaps a confusing one to anyone who has experienced trauma and abuse in their life. The helping professions are full of practitioners who deal in the art of forgiveness.  Religious, psychological and philosophical teachings all tell us that forgiveness is essential. “You have to forgive to be able to move on”, they…

5 Things You Can Do Right Now To Change Your Life

Life doesn’t always go as planned. As humans, we have to face constant changes in our lives and sometimes we get stuck. We get stuck in jobs, relationships, situations and life generally. Sometimes, we can pull through, other times more difficult. We are generally a resilient species and mostly we do what we can to…

Watch The Narcissist Who Flies Under The Radar

The typical image of a narcissist is one who sucks the air out of a room. He or she is the centre of attention and demands centre stage. This is the way that they boost their self-esteem void by making themselves seem far superior to all around them and they truly believe that everyone is…

Conflict: Problem Solving Rather Than Accusation

When problems arise in a relationship, couples are often told they need to “communicate” – or talk to each other. If a couple is in crisis, my feeling is that they need to talk more and not less. However, even those who do this often do not know how to talk about problems effectively and…

Should Your Spouse Be Involved In Your Therapy?

I know, this flies in the face of all we know and accept about client-therapist dynamics and the therapeutic process. But let’s face it, therapy is hard work. Undertaking the process means facing things that have been sometimes locked away for years. Once you open that door, you are never sure who or what will…