Tag: culture

Relationship Success? Luckily For Me, I Have One That Works But It Doesn’t Come Easily.

About this time of year, most people are reflecting on things that took place over the last year. You will find thousands of articles of this kind and even more as people start to think about New Year resolutions. Even people who do not write often will feel compelled to give their thoughts. Many will…

Perfection Doesn’t Exist But We Still Try Hard To Prove That Theory Wrong.

Samuel McChord Crothers once wrote ” try as hard as we may for perfection, the net result of our labors is an amazing variety of imperfectness. We are surprised at our own versatility in being able to fail in so many different ways.” Do you feel like what you accomplish is never quite good enough? Do you often put things…

Inner Child Therapy: Countering the Inner Critical Voice

When I practice Inner Child Therapy with clients, we invariably meet the Inner Critic at some stage. This can often be identified because of the “should” statements that are associated with its advice. When I look at my client base, I notice that I have a range of different personalities, issues and outlooks on life…

The Drama Triangle: A Key Element Of Codependent Control.

I have often documented here how much control exists in codependent thinking. In contrast to their nemesis (someone with narcissist tendencies), codependents are generally nice people who are willing to do most anything for the object of their codependency (usually a partner, sometimes a parent or employer and often all three). However, that ‘most anything’…

Increase your Self-Esteem in 10 Days. Day 9: Know Your Triggers

I am offering you the chance to change. Follow a series of posts and increase your self-worth and esteem. Low self-esteem is like a weight around your neck and stops you moving forward but it is not your story. It is the result of believing false stories and having a “I am bad” mental filter.…

Increase Your Self-Esteem in 10 Days. Day 1: Giving Up Judgment

I am offering you the chance to change. Follow a series of posts and increase your self-worth and esteem. Low self-esteem is like a weight around your neck and stops you moving forward but it is not your story. It is the result of believing false stories and having a “I am bad” mental filter.…

Survey Says More People Are Happier Post-Divorce With Infidelity Cited As A Cause For Marriage Breakdown

A new survey has suggested that women especially are happier being single, post-divorce and many of them suggest that the men in their lives “had to try harder”. Just what this means was not defined but we all know people in marriages and relationships that have become stale and routine. I would suggest this is…

Codependency: How To Give Up Control And Stop Rescuing Everyone

Codependency is a lot about control and controlling others. I have documented various methods frequently on this blog and how they manifest themselves into the typical dysfunctional behaviour associated with codependency. Codependents need control to feel secure and are loath to give this power away. One of the more common forms of control employed by…

Codependents: It’s Ok Not To Forgive Your Toxic Parents

The headline is perhaps a confusing one to anyone who has experienced trauma and abuse in their life. The helping professions are full of practitioners who deal in the art of forgiveness.  Religious, psychological and philosophical teachings all tell us that forgiveness is essential. “You have to forgive to be able to move on”, they…