Tag: Codependents

Why Most Codependents Are Women

The ideal woman for many men comes straight out of a codependent checklist. Many women are taught from an early age that they have to be a certain “way” around men. I have often dealt with women who are involved with abusive, emotionally distant men and cannot see that this is not functional for them.…

Codependency Stories Day 7: Addiction

Today, we highlight T who cannot seem to keep away from the “bad boys”. Time after time, she has been involved with men who have ultimately left her emotionally, physically and financially ruined. Yet she still goes back for more and cannot seem to help herself. This last time has been especially hard. After trying…

Codependency Stories Day 6

Today, we look at W who is making the biggest move of his life. W is moving across the country to be with his loved one. W has dealt very well with his codependent side of his personality to this point but has spent the last few days feeling extremely angry and down on himself…

Codependency Stories Day 3

Today we meet R. An elderly woman who has been married for 40 years to an emotionally distant husband in a very dysfunctional relationship. The physical side of their relationship is non-existent and things at home are complicated by the fact that their 35-year-old son still lives at home. Her husband tries to spend as little…

Combining Two Effective Therapies To Help Codependents

Codependency is a complex issue and many therapists doubt its existence. They might agree somewhat with the classic definition of codependency where an enabling partner helps an addict maintain his addiction but the idea of codependency in relationships, the love addiction, is disputed. However, codependency in relationships is something I see and work with every…

Narcissism: How Devaluing Destroys Their Codependent Victims

If you had the chance to study the way a narcissist behaves in a relationship, you might recognise a distinct pattern. A three stage whirlwind of a relationship that will leave a victim emotionally, physically and maybe also financially destroyed. The first stage, adulation, I dealt with in my last post. The second phase begins…

Codependency: Breaking The Fantasy Of The Adulation Stage

The power a narcissist has over his victim is all encompassing in the adulation stage and the “hooks” created can make even the most intelligent, rational person doubt their own sanity. It is the kind of brainwashing power that when transported onto a larger stage powers dictatorships, sects and ideologies like the Nazi party and…

Codependency: The Black And White Quest For Lost Connection.

Imagine deciding to walk from one town to another while carrying a two hundred pound weight? Then, when you finally shed the weight, someone comes along with something even heavier or more difficult to carry or you give up completely and decide to go home? You would be left with a choice where neither scenario…

A New Year. New Codependency Issues

I read an article recently about happiness written by a journalist who works for the Times in London. He was commenting about a book he was reading, given to him at Christmas, about how to find happiness in 2019. The title doesn’t really matter, as there are many such books on the market and as…