Tag: Codependent relationships

Choice Not Impulse Moves Codependents Forward

Anyone who is a regular reader of my work will know that I work with a lot of codependents who generally share a similar set of behaviour patterns with each other. Codependents are generally very nice people who have often been taken advantage of many times but have also been in situations where they have…

The Many Manifestations Of The Inner Critic

The concept of an inner critic is well known but most people have to deal with more than one manifestation. There might be one that attacks you for doing too much of something and another who then berates you for being lazy. The advice would be to work with each separately. I will now look…

Codependency: From Co To Counter

Due to their lack of self-esteem and the inability to self-care, codependents become enmeshed with others easily. They work on the idea that all the while they are like this, they do not have to face their own acute issues. They seek their validation from outside and react badly when this is not forthcoming in…

Fear Getting Close To Anyone? You Could Be Counter-dependent

The media and TV often celebrate people who are “strong”. Especially in the western world, strength is indicative of the ability to get things done, have a mindset of ambition, determination and healthy autonomy. The traits mentioned here are positive but could it be that something lurks under the surface that could be less than…

How Codependency Can Make You Sick

I believe firmly that it is only a matter of time before codependency becomes a recognised disorder. As discussed many times by this author, I have been challenged on occasions to prove that codependency truly exists and is not just a symptom of another disorder. The many clients I have who show similar debilitating symptoms…

Combining Two Effective Therapies To Help Codependents

Codependency is a complex issue and many therapists doubt its existence. They might agree somewhat with the classic definition of codependency where an enabling partner helps an addict maintain his addiction but the idea of codependency in relationships, the love addiction, is disputed. However, codependency in relationships is something I see and work with every…

Resentment: The Killer Of Relationships

In my daily work as a therapist, I deal with couples who are struggling to keep their relationship together. There are many reasons for this and some are more successful than others at working on the issues that divide them. I have found that it really does not matter what the issue is, if the…

Emotional Incest: How A Narcissist Parent Uses A “Golden Child”

There are many articles around on the internet about all types of narcissism and the dangers of being in a relationship with someone who has these tendencies. The advice is clear : get away from the situation as quickly as possible. Anyone who is more on the codependent side of the continuum will testify that…