How A Child Can Become A Parent Before Becoming An Adult

When we think about child abuse, our thoughts often stop at sexual abuse of minors. However, the term child abuse, often replaced by child maltreatment, has a broad spectrum of definition. The WHO defines it as follows : “Child maltreatment, sometimes referred to as child abuse and neglect, includes all forms of physical and emotional ill-treatment, sexual…

Building up to “Aha” Moments In Therapy

As a therapist, I am always happy when one of my clients has a “aha” moment. This is that very moment when everything comes together and you just know, it is going to initiate some form of positive change in the client’s disposition. I may have realised it was going to happen some time before…

Codependency: Stop The Rot By Connecting With Your Child

If you are a codependent and have children of your own, then there is a better than average chance that the codependent tendencies you have, will be passed down through a dysfunctional parenting style. One that has too many boundaries or not enough. Codependency is generational and many clients I work with have described one…

“He Is Like A Drug” Codependency: Truly An Addiction?

Originally posted on Codependency Is Not Love With Dr. Nicholas Jenner:
Can we really place Codependency in the same category as drug and alcohol addiction? Does it really compare in any sense to the misery of substance abuse, gambling or shopping addiction? Codependency has been called the “love addiction” and anyone who is “enmeshed” with…

As A Codependent, Boundaries Are Essential And Need To Be Maintained

I deal with many co-dependent people on a daily basis and one factor that is extremely common is the inability to set healthy boundaries. Codependent people experience emotional abuse in relationships because they are basically not able to form firm boundaries and allow others to take down those that they have. They are not usually…

When Codependents Get Nasty And Resistant To Therapy

It is wrong to assume that if codependency is identified as an issue, the person concerned is codependent with everyone in his or her life. There is usually only one or a number of people (or thing, e.g work, substances) but the typical behavior associated with codependents does not necessarily get projected on everybody. The…

A Gift From Your Parents: The Inner Critic

Life sometimes tells us that we are not deserving. We go through long periods of believing that there is something inherently wrong with us. One of the major factors in this process is the formation of an inner critic which is a major underlying cause of depression and low self-esteem.  The inner critic is often…

Face It! Increasing Self Esteem Is A Choice And Can Be Done Like This!

Consider this famous quote below: “The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.…

How Your Workload Could Burn You Out Emotionally And Physically

Burnout is a problem that many people either face or come very close to facing at some point in their life or career and the numbers are rising. According to the American Psychological Association : three-quarters of Americans experience symptoms related to stress in a given month: – 77% experience physical symptoms – 73% experience psychological symptoms.…

Now In Paperback: Our Quest For Happily Ever After.

Humans are the most interesting of species. We have the ability to determine our future, analyse the past, and make conscious decisions based on sensory input and the study of human behavior is wide and extensive. That said, when we interact with other human beings in a romantic sense, we often get it wrong and…