Self-Esteem Is About “Doing” Not “Being”. Increase Your Self-Worth In 5 Easy Steps

Self-esteem is a big issue for all of us and we could all do with more. In therapy, it is one of the most sought after goals that clients put on their wish list. “I need to increase my self-esteem”, I often hear. Just how many truly know what they are asking for is questionable;…

Allow Your Child To Push The Boundaries!

It`s Easter Sunday in the Christian world and many children will be allowed to do what they are usually not allowed to do. Eat chocolate in massive proportions! Rightly or wrongly, holidays such as this, along with Christmas mean that parents mostly drop the barriers and allow their children a bit more freedom. However, it…

A Self Challenge: Identifying The Parts Of My Own Thinking.

I have been quite active lately promoting the use of tools and methods to challenge and potentially overcome blocks in thinking that keep one stuck in the proverbial “hamster wheel” of inaction and overthinking. Partly inspired by reading and the influence of such therapies as psychoanalysis and internal family systems, I have been quite happy…

Book Excerpt: What Are You Prepared To Do For Your Relationship?

“Being involved romantically with another human being is to use a famous quote “the best and worst of times”. We proclaim our love, often far too quickly, and make irrational decisions. We believe we can take on the world and our own world is in order. Though when it goes wrong, things swing quickly in…

Dealing with Codependency In Therapy

At the heart of this process is a willingness to work on oneself and to accept that co-dependency is an issue in relationships. This means accepting responsibility for change and not passing that responsibility (or blame) onto others. It takes courage to look at and assess early life experiences and learn new skills that will help deal with early…

Throwback Post: The Three Stages Of Narcissist Relationships

Narcissists are the proverbial Jekyll and Hyde characters, one way one moment, one way the next. A roller-coaster ride for anyone involved with them. When we become involved in a new relationship, a need to bond and connect with others is usually the main reason, leading hopefully to love. However, narcissists have their own reasons…

Understanding The “Parts” of Your Thinking

Many therapeutic approaches deal with our thinking as a major part of the work needed to recover from our ills. CBT, especially, doesn`t look at events but how our perception of the event affects us. It looks at layers of thinking from automatic thoughts to core beliefs as an aid to this. CBT, however, works…

Why It Is Essential To Understand What Your Toddler Is Going Through.

The “Terrible Twos” can be a testing time for any parent. Even the most able of parents hope for this torrid time to pass as quickly as possible. As a parent myself, I know that tantrums and screaming can start at a moment’s notice and for no identifiable reason. It does not take much at…

New Podcast: Codependency & Polarized Thinking: The Key to Healthy Thought Patterns (E21 with Dr Nicholas Jenner)

The voices in our head that guide us are not always functional. Many of these protector voices were formed in childhood to keep us away from hurt and trauma. They follow us into adulthood and they are powerful influences on our lives. However, they stop us moving forward and facing our real fears. Learn how…

Narcissist Abuse Syndrome: Elements of Stockholm Syndrome and PTSD

I once had a client who was involved with the most abusive, self-absorbed, self-centered, controlling man you could ever imagine.  He abused her physically, emotionally, financially and verbally to the deepest levels. He was the nastiest individual I had ever come across in my many years as a practicing therapist. There was not a scrap…