Category: SELF-HELP

After Narcissist Abuse: Avoiding The Gaslighting That Will Certainly Come

The time has finally come. Your friendly neighbourhood narcissist has decided to ship out and move on to his next victim. The disappointment, guilt and feelings of being abused hurt and will take some time to get over but with him gone, it will certainly get slowly easier. However, the choice whether it is the…

After Narcissist Brainwashing, Breaking The Fantasy Is Essential

I am an avid watcher of the many well-produced documentaries on Netflix. They cover a wide range of topics from unsolved crimes through the working of the drugs trade. I find most fascinating the ones that deal with some form of psychological subject and how the mind works. Just recently, there has been a series…

Narcissism: How Devaluing Destroys Their Codependent Victims

If you had the chance to study the way a narcissist behaves in a relationship, you might recognise a distinct pattern. A three stage whirlwind of a relationship that will leave a victim emotionally, physically and maybe also financially destroyed. The first stage, adulation, I dealt with in my last post. The second phase begins…

Codependency: Breaking The Fantasy Of The Adulation Stage

The power a narcissist has over his victim is all encompassing in the adulation stage and the “hooks” created can make even the most intelligent, rational person doubt their own sanity. It is the kind of brainwashing power that when transported onto a larger stage powers dictatorships, sects and ideologies like the Nazi party and…

Codependency: Why No Contact After Narcissist Abuse Is Essential But It’s Not As Simple As It Sounds

It is common advice when recovering from narcissist abuse to go “no-contact” or more simply put, cut the person completely out of your life and block any possibility they have to get back in touch. There are many websites proclaiming “no-contact” as the main weapon against the temptation to get back with an abusive ex.…

What We Can Learn From Not Succeeding And Why We Shouldn’t Fear Failure.

Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.

Codependency: The Black And White Quest For Lost Connection.

Imagine deciding to walk from one town to another while carrying a two hundred pound weight? Then, when you finally shed the weight, someone comes along with something even heavier or more difficult to carry or you give up completely and decide to go home? You would be left with a choice where neither scenario…

Stop The Rage In Your Relationship

It is a fact to be taken for granted that couples argue and conflict will be a feature in their relationship. Conflict in itself is not bad and in fact it can improve a relationship if the couple concerned can learn from it. Arguing constructively is the ideal method to use conflict to better a…

Is This Your Relationship? If So, You Need To Change It Or Leave!

A good marriage with someone we truly love is generally the fairytale that is sold to us by society, sometimes parents and definitely religion. We are all expected to go on to develop along a certain tried and trusted path which includes marriage. Many are totally unprepared (especially if they marry young) for the immense…